It’s March 31, and by now a lot of New Year’s resolutions have already fizzled out. This recent post from Positive Intelligence caught my attention because it touches on something I see in coaching.

A big part of the problem is what happens the moment we slip. We start chastising ourselves, and the shoulds pile up. The inner critic takes over, and that kind of voice does not motivate us to keep going.

I see this often in coaching. The goal is often not the real issue. It’s what people start saying to themselves when they stop doing it perfectly. That shame, pressure and all-or-nothing thinking tends to get in the way.

If you’ve been talking to yourself harshly about something you wanted to change this year, you are in very good company. It may be worth noticing whether the way you are speaking to yourself is serving you.