When the House Goes Quiet

No matter when it happens, that moment when the house goes quiet hits hard.

For some, it is happening now. For others, it happened years ago, and the feelings still live in their bones.

The Anticipation and the Goodbye

A few years ago, both of our sons left for university. Nine hours away. At the same time.

I knew it was coming. I had time to prepare. But about two weeks before they left, something broke open in me.

I couldn’t stop crying. Everything felt dark and heavy. I couldn’t be on camera at work because my face showed it all.

The anticipation, for me, was worse than the reality.

Of course, walking back into our home after saying goodbye felt gut-wrenching. The house was too quiet and empty. But it was the buildup that nearly broke me.

What We Grieve

What I was grieving wasn’t just their physical presence. It was the end of the life we had known for so many years.

The dinners. The chaos. The inside jokes.

I genuinely love living with my kids, so even while I was proud and excited for them, the feeling of loss was profound.

Some people didn’t understand why I was so emotional. They told me I should be thrilled, and of course I was. But even if you had lived with a roommate for 18 years, you would be sad to see them go. And this wasn’t a roommate. These were my children.

The Quiet Shift

For some, the hardest part comes after they leave, when routines change and the emotional energy that once went into keeping someone else’s world turning has nowhere to go.

For others, it is the lead-up. And for many, it is both.

Because empty nest isn’t just about the kids being gone. It is about everything that leaves with them.

The noise. The structure. The role you have played for nearly two decades.

Eventually, something new emerges, but not right away. First there is the ache. The quiet. The “What now?”

A Gentle Reminder

You are not broken for feeling this deeply.

You are not overreacting.

And you are not alone.

This is not just a change. It is a reshaping of your identity. And it is okay if you do not know who you are right now.

Reflection Question: What has been most surprising for you in this transition?

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