The Wise Inner Voice
There are moments when my mind starts spinning over the smallest things. A detail that isn’t right. A message that didn’t sound how I meant it. A conversation I replay again and again, wishing I’d said something differently.
It’s easy to lose perspective in those moments, especially if, like me, you lean toward perfectionism. The desire to get things right can quickly turn into an urgency that doesn’t match the reality of what’s happening.
My husband sometimes looks at me with concern when I tell him I’m still thinking about something from a few days ago. He knows that once I start overthinking, it can take me a while to work through it.
When that happens, I’ve learned to pause and ask for advice, not from someone else, but from myself.
Meeting the Wiser Version of You
The wiser version of me, who’s lived a little longer and knows how to let go of what doesn’t really matter.
I imagine standing in front of her in a quiet forest. She looks calm because she’s learned that most things eventually work out, one way or another.
And when I start to list my current worries, the undone tasks, the words that came out wrong, the risk of putting myself out there, she listens, smiles, and asks gently:
What’s not as important as you’re making it?
What will still matter to you ten or twenty years from now?
Those questions bring perspective. They remind me that when we look back from the end of our lives, most of what feels urgent now won’t matter nearly as much as how we treated ourselves and others along the way.
A Practice You Can Try
You can try this too. When you feel anxious, overthinking, or trying to fix something that isn’t yours to fix, pause and picture your older, wiser self.
Notice their posture, their expression, their calm.
Ask:
What is truly important right now?
What am I blowing out of proportion?
What will still matter to me when this moment has passed?
If it feels easier, imagine a trusted mentor who sees your strengths clearly and wants the best for you. Let them respond from that place of calm wisdom.
Why This Matters
That wiser self is always there, waiting patiently. When we pause long enough to listen, they remind us what truly matters.
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(Inspired by Shirzad Chamine’s work in Positive Intelligence on connecting with the wiser elder self, and by Colleen-Joy’s visualization practice of meeting trusted mentors.)
Reflection Question: What would your wiser self remind you of today?
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