The Patterns We Share
One thing I loved about facilitating these past couple of weeks was seeing similar lightbulb moments with people in very different stages of life. It also reminded me how meaningful it is when something I care about is genuinely useful to someone else.
My Organizational Behavior students are finishing their first year of university, many just starting to think about how and where they want to work. The educators in the Mental Health for Teens course have 13–30 years of experience supporting students.
In both, people connected most with the idea of saboteurs and mental fitness. Saboteurs are the inner patterns that can take over when we are stressed, like the Judge, Controller, Pleaser, Avoider, or Hyper-Achiever. Mental fitness is the practice of noticing those patterns and building the ability to pause and ground ourselves before we react.
For some of my students, that meant truly understanding not everyone thinks the way they do. They started to see how their self-saboteurs affect the way they react to challenges and the people around them. Many had been taught to avoid conflict, and several told me they now see that healthy conflict can be better for everyone involved. They also appreciated how much they value a positive work culture, especially after watching Office Space. 😉
You Don’t Need to Be the Expert to Lead Well
A lot of people hold themselves back because they believe they need to be the expert in order to lead something well.
A couple of recent conversations with friends and colleagues helped me rethink that.
They helpfully reminded me: what if the value is not in knowing everything but in how you guide people through the experience? The content may be the same, but the person leading it changes the entire experience.
Seeing the Same Painting Differently
This week, I observed part of a mental health awareness course for teachers. I’ll be leading coaching and leadership courses for this organization, so it was a meaningful way to step back into work.
These were educators, people who spend their days guiding, supporting, and showing up for others. There was a little hesitation at first, but by the end of the week, I was struck by the vulnerability in the room and by how much they seemed to value the chance to connect with peers.
It made me think about how few opportunities many adults have for that. When you are constantly giving your attention, energy, and care to others, there may not be many chances for reflection with your peers or even simple, honest conversation with other adults.
