What Envy Might Be Trying to Show You
Sometimes the people we envy are pointing us toward something important.
I’ve been thinking about the people who expand my sense of what’s possible. What grabs my attention is rarely just their success. It is usually something more human than that: a sense of ease in who they are and the feeling that they trust themselves and the life they are building.
Envy can be useful. It can show us where we want to grow, what we want more of, and what feels possible for us too.
Why most New Year's resolutions fail by March
It’s March 31, and by now a lot of New Year’s resolutions have already fizzled out. This recent post from Positive Intelligence caught my attention because it touches on something I see in coaching.
A big part of the problem is what happens the moment we slip. We start chastising ourselves, and the shoulds pile up. The inner critic takes over, and that kind of voice does not motivate us to keep going.
I see this often in coaching. The goal is often not the real issue. It’s what people start saying to themselves when they stop doing it perfectly. That shame, pressure and all-or-nothing thinking tends to get in the way.
If you’ve been talking to yourself harshly about something you wanted to change this year, you are in very good company. It may be worth noticing whether the way you are speaking to yourself is serving you.
Breaking the Cycle with Compassion
I’ve made it to my fifth country, Taiwan, and a very obvious theme has emerged that I wasn’t expecting. Parenting has come up in conversation again and again.
In my women’s group, we were working through the PQ parenting module, and it took about five minutes for most of us to slide into the same place: the Judge, the shame, the fear that we’re messing our kids up. We had to keep coming back to a simple truth.
Finding Community
I’m writing this from Da Nang, and I’m a little stunned by the connections I’ve made here.
The day I arrived, I came straight from the airport, dropped my bags, and headed to a digital nomads event. The first people I met were a couple I clicked with immediately. We’ve gotten together several times since then, and we’re already talking about meeting up again this time next year and even them coming to see us in Sevilla next spring.
Since then, I’ve gone to a freelancers gathering and met more lovely, creative, like-minded people from all over the world. I’ve had a few really moving, empowering Saboteur Discovery Sessions that have inspired me as much as they’ve helped them.
More Than One Right Option
This week in Chiang Mai reminded me that the trip is going to unfold how it wants to, not how I plan it.
I’ve had a few moments where my inner critic starts telling me that if I’m not out meeting new people every day, I’m not doing what I should be doing.
This past week, I haven’t made many new connections, but I have been deepening relationships that already exist, and I’m realizing how much that matters.
Self-Trust in Practice
I’m writing this from my layover in Istanbul.
I thought I might cry when I walked out the door, but honestly, I’m just so excited, and I know the time will fly by. The train derailment so close to home has been shocking and puts everything into perspective. It’s also made me feel extra grateful and really loved by everyone who wanted to see my face one more time, and by all the care and concern for my safety.
Per usual, the anticipation was worse than the reality. I had a few nights with very little sleep, but now I feel calm and capable. Most of all, I feel grateful.
Choosing Indepedence and Self-Trust
Starting next week, I’ll be traveling through Asia for what I’m calling my Coaching Connections field study because, this year, I’m choosing more independence and a little more self-trust.
I first had this idea back in July, and it’s been staying with me. The timing feels right. The in-person trainings I’ll lead this year haven’t started yet, and life has a bit more space than it usually does. On a deeper level, I feel genuinely drawn to the places I’m visiting.
I want more independence this year, not just emotionally, but in how I build my life and work. One of my words of the year is visibility, and I’m excited to meet new people, have real conversations, and see how the themes I hear from clients translate across cultures. And I hope I might get to help a few people along the way.
Where Acceptance Meets Action
There are moments when life hands us something we didn’t ask for. A shocking turn of events, a disappointment, a door we thought would stay open.
Our first instinct is to resist it, make it make sense, or look for someone or something to blame.
I’ve done that plenty of times. It’s part of being human. The mind wants stability, a plan, a reason. But not everything can be fixed or forced to go our way.
The Space Between Who You Were and Who You're Becoming
You thought you had it figured out.
You’ve always had a good head on your shoulders. You know who you are. You’ve handled hard things before. You’ve been the strong one, the steady one, the one who makes a plan and lands on her feet smiling.
But this time, the ground feels uneven.
This transition, whatever it is, feels different.
Maybe you’re more emotional than you expected.
Maybe your usual clarity feels clouded.
Maybe the version of you that once fit… doesn’t anymore.
𝐓𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐔𝐩 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞: 𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐦 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐢𝐧 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩
It’s possible to have a kind, helpful partner and still feel completely alone.
Many women carry an invisible emotional load. They manage the logistics, the moods, the unspoken needs. They smooth the edges, hold the pieces, and silently wonder why they feel so depleted.
From the outside, nothing looks wrong. Which makes it even harder to explain the loneliness.
But you don’t have to explain it to the outside world. This is your life. Your truth. Not theirs.
